culture camp

My son and I are attending culture camp in Tulsa. It is an opportunity for families to gather to celebrate the joys of adoptions and also navigate the difficulties. It is awesome to be in a room of 200 Korean kids adopted. In this room they run, jump and celebrate each other. I am not sure how they process their uniqueness as a group, but they do in some child like way. I hear stories from parents, my son or daughter looks forward to this week all year long.

As a parent, it reminds me that my family is different. It reminds me that my family is special, unique and tremendously blessed. We are a Korean-American family. I try all year long to be the same and fit in with American culture. However, we are a thread that makes the tapestry of America beautiful.

I think God for this week and I am blessed to be part of this group. Especially the beauty of these wonderful families.

Fearless Joy,
Guido

The longest birthday

July 24th began for me waking up at 6:00 AM in Paris to get a shower and finish the last details of packing as we headed home. But the story begins in May.
Amy booked me on her flight to Paris, but did not buy the ticket. She just did not pull the trigger. She was waiting as she sometimes does when she purchases tickets. The hold lapsed and the ticket price went up 2 grand. So, I could fly on her flight if I wanted to spend 3000 dollars. She was going to be sitting in Business class and I in stowage/class. I told her that she should sit up front, she would be more comfortable. She felt guilty, but I told her. I want you to do sit up there.

Well when the ticket lapsed, she had to have me connect. So, I connected through Boston on a separate plane from my wife on my birthday. We arrived early for our flight, but Amy got us into the Admiral's club where we could COLD Diet Coke, water, and wine for free. Also, we could use our laptops since there were plugs on the walls.

Well, Amy's plane left first and I had time to wait. So, I put in Braveheart and watched the Director's commentary with Mel Gibson, never did that. So I had time.

TIme came for me to board, so I went up to my gate. I boarded and used my cool headphones that have better sound than the worthless earbuds of American Airlines. Flight came and went, I was awake the whole time. Arrived in Boston and left Boston.

The gist of this longest day. Somewhere over Kentucky, I looked up in my extreme tiredness and thought, "Guido, what a great day. YOu have watched Braveheart, guilt free. You have finished two books, guilt free. You have been to Paris. You have two great sons. You have such a relationship with your wife that you can send her alone across the world and both of you can have a sense of no guilt about that decision. Your relationship has a sense of pragmatism in its romanticism. Who cares that your meals for the day have included plane food and a dry tortilla wrap in the Boston airport. Your life is good."

The second longest day of my life was about gratitude and I turned a year older. If this is what growing up is about, then I gratefully welcome it.

fearless joy,
guido

The French

Interesting place, France. It was the wealthiest and greatest country in all of Europe. Before the 18th century, it was more poplulated and wealthier than any country. Ending World War I, it was the most dominant country in the world, but it had no resources to make it stick.

It was the center of philosophy, with Aquinas and Voltaire. It was the center of wealth with French Nobility. It was the center of Art with Monet, Manet, Picasso, and others coming here.

Funny thing to remember from history is that French Revolution was a reaction to the nobility that was corrupt. The revolution brough Guillotines and Napoleon. Neither were much for democracy. Unlike the American revolution which was a move to democracy that worked, the French revolution stalled and started. It reminded me that democracy is a hard task for people who do not know how to be free. Imagine Iraq and the countries where democracy is just trying to be learned. Perhaps, America is the anomaly and France is the standard. Perhaps, we cannot expect everybody to figure it out without a few failures. It took a generation in France to understand it. So Putin...might be Russia's Bonaparte.

Just an interesting thought as I walked through Musee Carnavalet, the history of Paris.

Fearless Joy,
Guido

The ancien regime

Louis IVX, the great Sun King of France thought highly of himself. He put his statue above the bust of Caesar. Louis had a chapel in Versailles. The nobles turned to worship him as he sat on the balcony worshipping God. That is the Divine Right of Kings on steroids. It also gives some reason why France went into Revolution.

Amy in Paris

Amy on top of the Arche d' Triomphe.

A mennonite in Paris

Flody Landis, the anti Armstrong, is going to be in Yellow tomorrow as he heads up to the Arch de Triomphe and down to the Plais de Concorde. I will be on the old Champs Elleyses watching him.

Fearless Joy,
Guido

trust

Yesterday, my son taught me about trusting with a cookie.

For lunch, I got a bagel and the combo on the bagel was a drink and cookie for a couple of bucks more. I wanted a drink and I thought I would give my son a cookie for after school.

The cookie was beside me, so I snitched a piece after I finished my bagel sandwich. When I picked him up, I decided that I as preist of the house, I would take my tithe, so I snitched a piece.

My son requested as we drove home, that I look forward and put my hand in the back seat. I did. He placed a cookie a piece of cookie in my hand. He gave me what I wanted. He then finished all he wanted of the cookie and gave me a bite left in the bag.

My son would have taken care of my desires if I would have trusted him. As I sat in the driver's seat, I felt like I was the child and he was the parent. That kid reversed the roles quickly on his pops.

I began thinking about this level of trust in my relationship with Jesus. How much do I trust Jesus to fill my needs and even my desires. How much trust is there? It is a growing edge for me and perhaps, I will no I am further up the road when I had a full cookie to my son next time.

Fearless Joy,
Guido

A month later here is a picture from Nathan's birthday. He was sick on his birthday and we had to delay the party until Memorial Day.

In the Tol, he chose a rice cake which means wealth and a book which means intelligence.

Thomas Friedman would be delighted with such a choice.

Fearless Joy,
Guido

Nathan's birthday

My where had the year gone.
When it starts at eight months, it moves quickly.
My son Nathan turns one.
Last day of school for Samuel and Nathan's birthday big day.
Luckily he is one, so nothing big is expected and he is clueless that today is special.

The weekend will involve a Tol celebration, a traditional Korean celebration.
He will choose his destiny in life will he be a scholar, a cook, wealthy, or such.
Don't put much stock in it, but it is a traditional celebration that is fun.

pictures of ceremony done by two dopey Texans Sunday.

fearless joy,
guido

The Chicks, part deux

I have heard a couple of folks talk about how this album is change for the Chicks. No, not really.
They are marketing this album heavily.
They are working on the blue state folks who make up 50% of the country.
They are being anti-country, because there are two folks in the world. The anti-country crowd and the country crowd.
They have worked out, got their hair done, and look better than they ever have. Gone is Natalie's mullet. They are selling sex appeal, something they have always done. They are selling it harder than ever.

If they were looking for a smaller audience....they would not play major venues.
They would wear sweat pants on the album cover
They would be on an indie label.
They would not be on Time.

No, they are just moving on after spending a couple of years calculating when to relaunch their careers.

This is a soap opera and the album plays into the soap opera a bit. So it is a bit plastic, but even plastic things have moments of grace.

It is still a good album, because they had to be absolutely precise in what they were doing. They did well.

fearless joy,
guido

The Chicks

I have been a fan of the Dixie Chicks before Natalie Maines arrived on the scene. I have 'Thank Heavens for Dale Evans." I go back 12 plus years. I like the old sound, because it was Texas Swing. However, I did not player hate the new sound and moved along with it.

I really enjoyed the last album, but after the fiasco in London I did not pick up any of the Natalie albums and play them. I am not sure why, but I just did not.

The last few Sundays, I have been preaching a sermon series on "Mending Fences, fixing broken relationships." I finished up the series last Sunday and I did not compute the Chicks album coming out. However, in the midst of mending fences, i decided to pick up the album. Not that I have anything against them other than they were fairly foolish.

Have I been foolish? yes.
In a spirit of being a person who has said the wrong thing at the wrong time and wanted to make amends...I bought the album. Having been a person who was not forgiven when I asked to be forgiven...I bought the album.

It is the best Chicks album so far. It is painful, poignant, and lacks some of the fun of 'Earl.' I liked the Earl song, it was humorous. It is clean musically and well produced. The words of the songs have a purpose.

so, if you have needed forgiveness in your life and your friends have you let down...this album will speak to you.

Fearless Joy,
Guido

running, why i do it?

I am not a natural runner.Running is not something that really was a part of my life. I used to run and I would four blocks dying of exhaustion and come home feeling very dejected and worse than when I left. So, I began strolling for fun with my dog.

Then I decided that I would run in a 4 mile run when I was 29 or 30. I found out 6000 people were there and thought if 6000 people were there then I would probably not be the slowest person there. So, I ran with a couple of friends and had a blast. Over the next year, I ran on the treadmill at the gym and worked out. Just to maintain life. I then got a flyer for running a marathon in Dublin, Ireland for the Arthritis foundation. My wife has had Arthritis since she was 6 years old. So, I raised money and trained to run this marathon.

In the midst of the training, I ran with folks and began developing these relationships. There is something about running in the heat of August for 18 miles that I began sharing part of my life. I still have friendships with a couple of those guys. There was something about rising at 6:00 AM running for 2 hours and coming home to say, "i just ran 12 miles." I impressed myself.

That was 2001 and five years later, I run because I enjoy the people. I enjoy that part of my week where I get up and run around the lake in the cool of the morning. I enjoy the hills and I enjoy the people I run alongside. They are good people and there are stories of life that are shared. In fact, the marathons are not equal to the training. The marathon are joyful, but I rise at 4:45 AM on Saturday to see people who I have learned to love.

in a couple of weeks, I am going to run a grueling 1/2 marathon in Kansas City. I am not prepared physically, but I will run because for two hours I will get to hang out with friends. They will make an unpleasant experience, awesome.

fearless joy,
guido

Moussaoui and McVeigh

I was on the treadmill yesterday afternoon when I saw the screen flash the news that Moussaoui was going to get life imprisonment.

There will be much debate on whether or not this was the right decision and some will complain to the jury about it. However, that is the system.

I have been thinking about this for a long while. I recall when Timothy McVeigh was sentenced the death penalty for the OKC bombing. My thought at that time was that McVeigh needed to die to heal the wounds of the country. An American killing Americans as an act of terrorism as horrible as it felt, he needed to die. I remember when he was executed. The sun rose the next morning and there was nothing different with the world. The anger, the hatred, the violence, the grief all still hung in the air. His death did not heal the country, it did not restore life, and it seemed to me from my point of view to do nothing. I felt no great joy nor great sadness over his death. He was just dead.

As Moussaoui was denied the death penalty and the chance to be a martyr, I really had been thinking about McVeigh a lot. Killiing Moussaoui was going to do nothing to end terrorism in this world. Killing Moussaoui was not going to ressurect towers or people. His death would not change the world for better or worse, it would mean nothing.

His life in imprisoned, perhaps he will feel the power of a country who has given him a life that is really no life at all. All bars, hard concrete, and a sliver of light. Also some of the worst food in the world. I am not sure on all of this, but I know from last experience of death penalty and national justice...the world did not change when a terrorist was executed. If it did, the world changed for the worst.

Fearless Joy,
Guido

Aliens and the Spirit

I called into a talk show today to speak from the point of view of faith. I know that there is no such thing as dialogue. There is only a monologue with callers either being cheering fans or straw figures. I was a straw figure today. I am upset, I called. I am upset I am not more eloquent in my faith. I took the bait and was made a fool. Should have left the talking of the faith to Jim Wallis and Tony Campolo. I do better in my corner of the world. However, for my own therapy this is my response what I wished I would have said.

From Dr. King's "Letter from Birmingham Jail"
"You express a great deal of anxiety over our willingness to break laws. This is certainly a legitimate concern. Since we so diligently urge people to obey the Supreme Court's decision of 1954 outlawing segregation in the public schools, it is rather starnage and paradoxical to find us consciously breaking laws. One may well ask, "how can you advocate breaking some laws and obeying others.?" The answer is found in the fact that there are two types of laws: there are just and there are unjst laws. I would agrewith Saint Augustine that "an unjust law is no law at all."
Now what is the difference between the two? How does one determine when a law is just or unjust? A just law is man-made code that squares with moral law of God. An unjust law is a code that is out of harmony with moral law. Any law that uplifts human personality is just. Any law that degrades human personality is unjust."

Now, the debate is whether or not the law is just or unjust. I think they are not just. They might be right and correct, but not just. The issue of poverty means I must stand with the poor. Sort of like the statue of liberty, (tongue in cheek, but also half true)

The problem is that Jesus who was an alien in Egypt, Matt 2:13-15. He fled Israel to find safety in Egypt. He was a 'wetback.'

Leviticus 19:33 When an alien resides with you in your land, you shall not oppress the alien. The alien who resides with you shall be to you as the citizen among you; you shall love the alien as yourslev, for you were aliens in the land of Egypt: I am the Lord you God."

Jesus says in the great commandment, "Whenever you do it to the least of these, you do it to me." The least of these in this society are illegals who are being exploited. Jesus has concern for them.

As I look at the scriptures which are a higher authority than the Constitution, I see that my role as a Christian is to care for those who are here. They could be drawn here by the very will of God. I am not sure, but I care for those who are in need.

There is a difference between a murderer and an alien. The scriptures are very clear on that.
What i recommend is that you ask your pastor friends to open up the Bible and study with you. I know you disagree and you and I will talk until we are blue in the face. I hold scripture as the ultimate authority, you hold something else. That is alright. You have your right to your opinion, it is not just on the side that God is on. That is OK, God will win. He always does.

This is a very complex issue and it would be good if you let your faith worked it out. I am just one of those red letter Christians that believes in Jesus more than America. Sorry, but my Lord is Jesus. I love you Mike, but you need to go deeper in your faith.

Finally, in 1890's my great grandfather came to Galveston from Denmark. My other great grandfather hated my grandfather, because he was a "Danish Speaker." The issue today is not new, it is old. I stand with the folks who brought people into this great country and welcomed them. Those folks were the heroes, not John Birchers, the Know-Nothings, and the other bigots, like my great grandfather, who were wrong. This country is better now with folks like my family than without them.

I am not an American Christian, I am a global Christian. I am united with my pentecostal, conservative, and liberal brothers and sisters by the power of Jesus Christ that transcends borders or biases. I believe this and it shapes the way I view the world.

Fearless Joy,
Guido

Being Dad

Last night, my son's t-ball team played a game and they won. My son was the pitcher and he made an outstanding double play meriting him the game ball.

The cooler thing was the whole team contributed. It was not just one player, so I think the whole team should have put their small hands on that ball and said, "Awesome."
There is this one kid who has ADHD and when he loses focus, he is hard to work with. If somebody cuts in line, all he can do is focus on that issue. He does not listen to me when I tell him to run, he does not bat well, and he is not that great in the field. He is the kid you would pick last on the team. This kid knocked in the winning run.

I stood on the first base line and I saw that if this kid who is often relegated to the side actually got this hit...he would knock in the winning run. He stood up to bat and I just yelled and yelled. "You just hit that ball hard. Hit is as hard as you can."
He swatted that ball right by the pitcher. He ran to first base and was safe. We now had a seven run lead and the other team could not catch us. He was a hero and my player of the game. I went to the dugout and said to his mother, "You noticed your son knocked in the winning run. You need to tell him that he caused us to win." It was awesome. A mother who felt awful often about her son's behavior and was totally stressed could now beam that her son had worth on that field.

That is why I coach. I coach to love on those kids and to tell those parents they are doing good work. Often, I am too hard on my own son. Sort of sad, but many folks tell me that. Those that are closest have many demands. However, when we went home, I let him be the star player. Lifted him up and beamed a bit of pride myself. He is growing up and hopefully this wonderful kid will not be screwed up by some overbearing father.

Fearless Joy,
Guido

Pinpointing Jesus

One of the issues about reading scripture is that it forces us to do some things we don't like to do which is be challenged with who Jesus is. I have friends who I know what they are going to do, but Jesus is not like that. He changes. I read the gospels and there is another time when Jesus pushes the envelope of my understanding. Todays is Matthew 18:10

"Take care that you do not despise one fo these littles, for I tell you, in heaven their angels continually see the face of my father in heaven."

I really had that verse starting at "For I tell you"

You see that whole guardian angel thing really has no place in my spirituality. It is hoky to me. It is Capital One commercial schlock?, sentimentality of "It's a Wonderful Life" good movie, bad theology.

However, here comes Jesus, the very Word of God, blowing up my ideas and my viewpoints. So, I have to wrestle with that notion. I have to entertain these angels a bit in my thoughts and minds. I have to come to the darn frustrating conclusion that I do not have a full grasp of the scriptures. Bothersome, but I think i like it this way. It keeps me humble and it keeps me from becoming all knowing...it keep me from becoming a god to myself.

fearless joy,
guido

Easter End Day

Another Easter day is over. 2 Services. In fact, Holy Week was problematic all around.
Maundy Thursday, the Christ Candle that had been rigged had become unrigged. Note to self, I will buy a new Christ Candle and we will quit trying to save money with putting votives in the candle. So, I solved that problem, but was bothered by it not working perfectly.
Good Friday, had a great video that died and the media presentation died. Oiy!!!
Easter Sunrise, the sound equipment was a miserable mess.
Easter Breakfast, the Men were awesome and a guest brought potatoes to share. Awesome.
Easter Main, great service. It was a good day.
So, I said a couple of things. I will quit messing with sound equipment and let the pros mess with it. As a control freak that is hard. However, I will give it up.

I will do media right or not do it all.

I vistited the visitors this afternoon.
I had family lunch at the in laws.
I dropped off leftover breakfast at SafeHaven, an intermediate housing facility for the homeless.
It was a full day and it was Easter. Easter is easy. It like a hanging curve ball. An elevated Tee with the wind at the back. A 50 degree overcast, still Marathon morning. At the end of the day. I am tired. However as I was disappointed with myself. I thought every contigency this week had been done.
A couple of folks said, "Good Friday service was awesome."
"The video messed up and it was really good."
"I know, but I really like that service. It made my day. You all do worship well."
I needed to hear that. I beat myself up pretty good about not being perfect and for a person to say..."You know that made my day, reminded me that Jesus is more important than I am."

Had another compliment that made my day, several about my sermon but the sermon was good. Sorry, not being a braggart, it was just a good sermon. I will tell you when it sucks. I also will tell you when I deliver. The last comment made my day and gave me hope.

It is a long day Easter and I told a friend of mine, "Why are they not like this every week?" Then I said, "probably some of that has to do with the pastors mostly."

It has been a good day and it is a reminder of why I am a pastor. Love the people and preach about the power of Jesus' life, death and resurrection.

I am heading off the sleep and then tomorrow to pray and recharge.

joy,
Guido

being a native border state guy

Lived in Texas most of my life and in West Texas for many years.
Before 9/11, the culture of the Rio Grande was pretty ambigious. When we went to Big Bend National Park, we used to swim across the river to Mexico. I remember rafting one time and winding up on the Mexican side as we overshot our take out location. People come across back and forth and live in between, the Frontier/Frontera. Frontera in Mexico is designated strip of land along the border. 50 Miles I believe. People who live on the Frontera are different. Mexicans or Americans who are influenced by the other country.

Illegals were part of life. I found shoes made out of tires as a kid that an illegal had made as he journeyed north. I have passed through border patrol checkpoints. Illegals were punchline of jokes. Used the term "wetback" a couple of times in my youth. Shouted, "La Megra?" spanish for border patrol a few times as well. As I have aged, the punch line has come that I have come in contact with illegal immigrants. The jokes have stopped, because they do not reveal reality.

I really hate that notion of a fence. It does not work and will not work. It seems communist to me to have a fence. As a child, I would go to our border look across the Rio Grande and think this is America. I would think of the pictures of the Soviet Union where there were barbed wire fences that kept people out. The notion of a fence just seems so unAmerican. Maybe it is America, post cold war...anxious and fearful. Valuing security and fear over freedom and hope.
Israel put hope in the walls of Jerusalem...and they fell.

I guess that is just the Ronald Reagan in me, a border state govenor who became President who granted amnesty. If we put up the fence and one day10,000 people will just cross it at one point and destroy the border. It will happen, because a border fence is not more secure than the Berlin Wall. Jeez, the Bible tells us that walls do not work.

Just a Texas boy who fears Jesus, not a Yankee. So, I know I have a different view of life.

joy,
Guido

Justice.

One thing about illegal immigration is that it is not just. The Coyotes require that folks pay a great amount of money to come into America. They also will put them in harm's way if it means that the choice is between the death of a client and their own skin. There are stories all the time of folks dying in tractor trailers and box cars. Human Borders provides water and maps so folks will have a clue of what they are attempting. So, there is a justice issue.

The other justice issue is that illegal immigrants get paid bottom tier wages. This is creating a larger divide between the poor and the wealthy. It is killing the middle class. I am a part of this, because I contract out my lawn for service. I pay 25.00 for my lawn to be mowed. The crew is 3 to 4 people. They work 30 to 40 minutes to do my lawn. It would take me 3 hours. Now divide that twenty five dollars. Some goes to the contractor who I pay and then he takes his cut, the largest cut and he pays his workers. I don't know if they are illegal or not. Don't ask, don't tell. But, I want to give the trickle down on this. They are making minimum wage or a little better, remember minimum wage is not living wage. However, there are individuals who would mow lawns and in Kansas City, I would pay 30 to 35 dollars for a lawn mow. 50 dollars for leaf raking. It was to some guy driving down the street looking for work. It was more expensive, but the folks were not illegal immigrants. So, I am not sure what to say, but illegal immigration lowers prices on services. The market might be fair, but it is not always just.

The problem that I struggle with is this. The lawn service is so cheap that it is grossly conveinent to use them. They provide a service that I know my lawn will always look good on Wednesday. Meetings, baseball games, and other things do not interfere with the lawn being done. So, I know I have a part in this issue of justice and I condemn myself in it.

joy,
Guido

Immigration and protest

Last week, I saw several students carrying Mexican flags as they headed to downtown Dallas. There was much debate about whether or not they knew what they were doing as they marched. I think that is unfair, because I am sure that not all of the children who marched in Birmingham or Selma knew fully what those marches were all about. I doubt if the Million men who marched on Washington were all there for the same purpose.

But, I think what they are expressing without using words is that the debate on immigration has some racial overtones. Folks are not complaining about Asian or European immigration. It is Mexican immigration. I think there are several issues in this immigration debate. I want so share them in the next few posts.